What am I expecting?
Hoping for?
Looking for?
Longing for?
Two thousand years ago, they were hoping for a way out of oppression.
They were longing for freedoms.
They were looking for a king…
…a king who would do all of this and more for them.
This past Sunday, Palm Sunday, marked the commemorative start of the Christian Holy Week. In many of our churches, we marked it by handing out palm fronds. Sometimes the fronds have been woven into a cross-like symbol meant to be kept as a remembrance. Some churches give out a single spear from a palm leaf, some give a small frond, and some hand palms out to wave during a particular worship song.
Last year I happened to be in Montreal, Canada, for the start of the Holy Week, and I visited the Notre-Dame Basilica just before Palm Sunday. I had been there as…
A little boy … probably seven or eight years old. He was sitting in the auditorium with his dad just a couple of rows from the stage.
I first noticed it at the start of the service, and it bothered me just a bit.
His motion was distracting. It was tense. It was filling the entire space in front of him.
From the start of the opener, he rocked front to back in his seat to .every.single.beat. of the music.
He stopped for the announcements. At the moment we were invited to stand for worship, he started again. Through the four worship songs, he just rocked in perfect rhythm with the beat … fast or slow … it didn’t matter.
He kept perfect timing.
About half of the way through the first song, I think I started to get it. In that moment, I felt awed. I think this little boy may have been autistic, and he was completely moved by the music. His daddy would glance at him now and again, but the little boy’s response to the music during worship was perfectly normal to his dad.
The beat of the music slowed for the last two of the four worship songs, and so did his rocking. By the time we hit the first bridge in “Oceans,” I knew the attitude of my heart during the service’s opener was way off base.
The lyrics to the bridge say:
“Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders Let me walk upon the waters Wherever you would call me Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander And my faith will be made stronger By the presence of my Savior”
Here was this wonderful little boy … he was fully immersed in worshipping his Savior. He was fully immersed in the beat of the music. He was fully immersed.
He was trusting.
He was out there walking upon the water.
He was going where he was called.
He was being taken deeper.
He was being made stronger.
He was sitting there rocking in the presence of his Savior.
The only distraction I was now feeling was how this little boy was worshipping so deeply and was serving as such an example for me.
It often takes the faith of a child to help us see where He’d have us go.
(Lyrics via MetroLyrics & Hillsong United – Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)
In a life built on faith, there is always a reason. Always.
We don’t often understand the fullness of the incidence or of the reason, but just because we don’t understand, does not mean a reason does not exist.
A friend introduced me to this poem several months ago during a women’s Bible study. We were studying Ann Voskamp’s One Thousand Gifts, and on pages 55-73, Ann takes us through a lesson about bridges. Ann cites this poem on page 71 of the Study Guide, but I say that “a friend introduced it to me,” because until my friend Sarah read it out loud, I hadn’t really “read” it while studying it. Sarah is a poet at heart. She’s a writer, but also a poet. She’s been blessed to see, experience and re-tell her own stories through His poetic lens and license, and when she read it to our group, I closed my eyes, and I “got it.”
Today, my son brought this to me to begin working on it as a recitation during his homeschooling speech class. The photo of the poem is from his textbook.
A coincidence? No … a God-incidence.
I had to have seen this poem a few years ago when my daughter went through the same curriculum and speech class. I had to have seen it at that time. Why didn’t I recall it from back then?I’m pretty sure I didn’t recall it, because God hadn’t spoken it into a part of my heart until Sarah read it in our small group time. That’s when it spoke to me.
It spoke then — that day in our small group, but I didn’t do much with it. I oooo-ed and aaaah-ed with the rest of our group about the meaning and the depth, but I’m not sure it really intersected with my heart at all in the days, weeks and months that followed.
In my church yesterday, the pastor gave a message about being “good soil” from Jesus’ parable in Luke 8.
There is a lot in common with bridge building and being good soil.
With a heart filled with gratefulness to Him, I can say — because of Him — I am good soil. I’m grateful our Lord has given me a heart willing to be good soil, and I’m also grateful for all of those who have uprooted thorns in my life, pulled weeds, tended to my soil, nurtured it, planted the Word in it, and have spoken into my life at some point along the way.
The last few months have found me struggling with the task of perseverance in my life. I’ve been called to persevere through some tough stuff, and it’s been wearing on me. The soil message was one I needed to hear. It reminded me that the tasks to which He has called me have a greater purpose He wishes to bring about. Yes, some of this is about me, some of it is about the others it involves, but the soil He is turning and the bridges He is building have a purpose for which He has not fully revealed to me.
Happenings in our lives are woven together by the Master. Nothing is allowed to occur in our life without first passing through His hand. We’ll never know the reason for much of it, but when we can see glimpses of how He is weaving His story into our lives, it should awe us to no end.
So when I struggle with perseverance, and when I happen to hear a message at church on Saturday night about the storms of life, and then I go to church on Sunday to hear a message about soil, and the storm and soil messages are reinforced on Monday by a bridge message, it is NO coincidence. It’s Him speaking something into my life that He wants me to hear.
I recognize His presence and His weaving in the circumstances of my own life, and I recognize them in His calling on me to persevere through the storms, to maintain good soil and to continue building bridges for His purpose and for His will.
This photo belongs to DaySpring, (in)courage, and the (in)RL Conference.
I have a question for you:
Which fairytale creature, mythical being, Muppet puppet, character from “The Princess Bride,” cupcake flavor, Disney princess or “Star Wars” character are you?
If you spend any time on Facebook, you’ve seen the silly quizzes your friends have tried and the results they’ve posted. I might be considered a party-pooper, but I haven’t done any of them. If there is a possible answer that would tell me I’m a volcano-climbing, coffee-loving, adventure-seeking, faith-filled, healthy-gardening wife and momma who homeschools her kids, likes good food, can’t get enough of nature and dabbles in writing … THEN, I might check boxes in a quiz to see what the answers reveal.
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Last weekend, I participated in an online conference by (in)courage. The focus of the online conference was for us to feel empowered to share our (in)real life stories with one another.
The speakers were women who had a story.
Does that sound like you? It sounded like me. The women shared their stories. They were all different, but they all mattered.
WHY? Why did all of their stories matter? They mattered because thousands of women tuned in over the weekend to hear someone tell a story that made sense, that held familiarity, that held hurt, that held grace, that held mercy and that He used in some way.
My story wasn’t talked about and neither was yours,
but there were tiny bits and pieces of my story
Not everyone is meant to be a writer or a blogger like the women above and those from the (in)RL Conference. But, we all still have stories that matter.
One thing that was said repeatedly in the promos and in the videos was, “We need your story.”WHO is the “we?” My takeaway was …
It’s us.
It’s those of us who wonder from where our value comes.
It’s those of us who want to know how a broken heart can heal.
It’s those of us who are living in singleness.
It’s those of us who wonder who else cares.
It’s those of us who have watched our husbands die.
It’s those of us who cry in our quiet moments.
It’s those of us who feel the need to put on the smile mask.
It’s those of us who have watched our marriages fall apart.
It’s those of us who were violated.
It’s those of us who are lonely.
It’s those of us who wonder, “Why me?”
It’s those of us who have lost a child.
It’s those of us who have never been able to carry a child.
It’s those of us who have been cheated upon.
It’s those of us who feel lost.
It’s those of us who don’t know how to get through today.
It’s those of us who don’t know from where our hope comes.
It’s us.
It’s us. We are the “we” in “We need your story.”
You have a story. There’s someone out there who needs to hear your story.
They need to hear it, because it matters.
WHY does it matter?
It matters because you matter.
You aren’t a mythical creature, a princess or a movie character. You are you.
You also aren’t only one (or more) of those sentences above. You are you.
When we find ourselves in our story, and when we have a heart to become what God created us to be, our story grows and it changes. The hurts, the heartaches and the heaviness in our lives are a part of our stories, but we come to realize and we come to live, because we know that God isn’t finished with us yet.
He’s working on us, in us and through us to make our story all He created it to be. He’s working on us, in us and through us to make US all He created us to be.
And … even though He isn’t finished with us yet, He wants us to be available for Him. When we are willing to be available to share our story with others who might need to hear it, we continue to grow our story, and that story has the power to impact others. When we can seek and find the hope and redemption in our story, AND we’re brave enough to share parts of that story, that hope and that redemptionwith others, we offer them a rope of hope … one in which they can grab hold of and use to pull themselves toward Him.
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I attended the (in)RL conference last year, too. The Lord had already begun working in me, leading me to write, and leading me to hope. I had ideas, I had writings, I had a name, but I lacked the bravery to put it all out there, even though I felt Him prodding me forward.
After sitting in the comfort of my own home for (in)RL in April 2013, I knew I had to take a step forward toward where He was leading. Hope Surrendered was born shortly afterward. I haven’t shared a lot of the background of my story; some of you know some of it, but none of you know all of it. I’m very grateful to the people of DaySpring, (in)courage, and of the (in)RL Conference for what was given to us in both 2013 and in 2014, and I am here, in part, because of the courage gained from them to share my story with you.
For a lot of reasons, I’ve not shared much of what is behind me, but do know this: The Lord has used almost all of that in moving me forward. Some of that “moving forward” is here in the pages of this site where I share with you some of the ways I’ve learned from His leading.
Our stories — yours and mine — have many layers. Our Lord can use our stories to help others move past their hurts, to lean into the challenges they are facing and to lay a stepping stone for those whose upheaval might be yet to come. Our stories might plant seeds of hope for a generation to come.
When we surrender our story to Him and allow Him to use us, He will find a way to use our story.
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If you are willing, if you are led, or if you need an ear to listen, you are welcome to email me with parts of your story or you can comment below.
I’d be honored to pray for you.
My email address is hopesurrendered@gmail.com.
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